Life is so unpredictable, and the one thing I have learned is that no matter what it throws at you, roll with it. There is a reason for every situation you encounter. God doesn't let anything happen that is not supposed to. We should embrace our circumstance and learn from them, if we do something positive can come from it. I have to say that I am enjoying being off and spending quality time with my daughter. I have also had a chance to explore my interest in writing. I had an article published in Inspired Women and Christian Ladies.net entitled, Become the Peacemaker. Lord has really been blessing me. In Touch Magazine is also reviewing Become the Peacemaker and considering it. I am now a columnist at Moms of Faith too! Wow, once you get determined and have faith that God will lead you in the right direction anything can happen.
I have decided to write my book about being a spiritual single mom. I know in my heart this is the direction I should go in. Lots of exciting changes.
Thank God for every day and every breath! Praise God!
Check out my article
wwww.inspiredwomenmagazine.com
Become the Peacemaker
Moms of Faith
http://momsoffaith.com/
Sunday, May 3, 2009
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Precious Time
Wow, it has been a long time since I have written. It is now March and there is snow on the ground, I can hardly believe that we are in the third month of 2009. Time goes by so quickly, as it says in the bible life is but a vapor and than it vanishes. How very true that verse is. It seems like only yesterday I was graduating from high school, actually it was 1990 and I am now turning 37 years old. But, how God has blessed me to give me 36 years here on earth. Have I always made the best of my time? Hardly. When I think back about how much precious time I wasted that the lord gave I shudder. However, the one thing you can not do is go back to the past you can only go forward. I may not be perfect, but I am much better than I used to be. I have seen God working in my life in such a way that I am astonished at his ever lasting love for me.
This year I have made a decision to make good use of the precious time that he has granted me with. I do not want to waste it away, I want to enjoy it, make it useful, and do good with it. Although I work full time when I get off of work my attention is focused on my daughter and that time is precious and critical. The best thing we can do for our children is to give them our time, attention, and first and foremost a spiritual foundation. That is why I try to always incorporate pray in our time together, whether it is before a meal, going to bed, or before going to school. We read a children's bible and we talk about the lessons we can use in our daily life. It makes me proud that at 3 years old Anya's favorite bible story is David and Goliath. The time we spend together is free and is the best thing that I could provide for her.
For myself, I am using my time to read the bible, take notes, and read spiritual literature, and I can't tell you how much of a difference it is making in my life. When you drift away from God you can feel it inside and when you head back to the lord this feeling of comfort covers you a like a warm blanket. The lord wants us to use our time wisely and when we do we are rewarded.
Our days are numbered here on earth, but while we are here we should use the time to become closer to God. I want the next 37 years of my life or hopefully more to be time well spent, to become closer to my saviour, to use my spiritual gifts that he has given me, to be a responsible parent that teaches her child about the goodness of God, and to be a servant of the lord.
He has given me so much to be thankful for. A wonderful daughter, a job that provides a warm and comfortable home for us, health, family, and the thirst to want to learn more about him. The least I can do is to use my time to serve him.
God Bless!
This year I have made a decision to make good use of the precious time that he has granted me with. I do not want to waste it away, I want to enjoy it, make it useful, and do good with it. Although I work full time when I get off of work my attention is focused on my daughter and that time is precious and critical. The best thing we can do for our children is to give them our time, attention, and first and foremost a spiritual foundation. That is why I try to always incorporate pray in our time together, whether it is before a meal, going to bed, or before going to school. We read a children's bible and we talk about the lessons we can use in our daily life. It makes me proud that at 3 years old Anya's favorite bible story is David and Goliath. The time we spend together is free and is the best thing that I could provide for her.
For myself, I am using my time to read the bible, take notes, and read spiritual literature, and I can't tell you how much of a difference it is making in my life. When you drift away from God you can feel it inside and when you head back to the lord this feeling of comfort covers you a like a warm blanket. The lord wants us to use our time wisely and when we do we are rewarded.
Our days are numbered here on earth, but while we are here we should use the time to become closer to God. I want the next 37 years of my life or hopefully more to be time well spent, to become closer to my saviour, to use my spiritual gifts that he has given me, to be a responsible parent that teaches her child about the goodness of God, and to be a servant of the lord.
He has given me so much to be thankful for. A wonderful daughter, a job that provides a warm and comfortable home for us, health, family, and the thirst to want to learn more about him. The least I can do is to use my time to serve him.
God Bless!
Monday, December 22, 2008
Merry Christmas
Well, it is that time of year, Christmas. A time to give thanks for one another and to celebrate the birth of Jesus. It is also a time of Christmas dinners, gifts and family rituals. Christmas has always been a great time of year for me, except for the past couple years. Last year on December 26th my beloved grandmother Eva passed away from Alzheimers. It was clearly a heartbreaking time for me and my family. My gram was the closest you could get to having a guardian angel on earth. She was always there for me and my family. She was a woman that was always kind and loved the lord. When you were around her there was a certain peace that surrounded her. I had said during her eulogy that she was in this world but she truly was not of it.
I was blessed to have my grandmother in my life for 35 years, but even if I had her for 50 more years it would not be long enough. She was 85 years old and lived a wonderful life, but even though she was 85 it still seemed too soon. She visited me through all my jaunts to other cities, we spent wonderful times together in Santa Barbara and DC this was a woman who never travelled all her life but when I moved across country she got on a plane twice and came to see me, not to count the numerous times she came to DC. She was there when my daughter was born and got to spend some time with her, but I still wish she were here.
I have to say that last Christmas was very difficult. But out of all adversity there comes grace and blessings. I was able to get home (Pittsburgh) on Christmas Eve. Anya opened her Christmas presents at our home during the morning on Christmas Eve and then we drove to Pittsburgh. I was able to sit by my grandmother's bedside and talk to her, read her the bible, pray for her and stay up all night next to her. The nurse from hospice informed us that it could be any time now. During Christmas day, somehow we all still opened presents, said our Christmas prayer, and had dinner. I am not sure how we maintained normalcy during that time but we did. I stayed near my grandmother's bedside, sometimes crying, sometimes smiling while remembering all the good memories we had. After everyone left it was very quiet and I knew that this would be the last Christmas I would spend with her. This was incredibly sad, but I was also incredibly blessed because I was able to spend one last holiday with my Eva.
Something amazing happened, my daughter Anya who was not even 2 yet was sitting next to my gram with me, and she was touching her hand, saying, Eva, beautiful. Then all of a sudden she looked up and said pap pap Earl. She never knew my grandfather (she saw a few pictures of him in the past) and there was not a picture of him in the room we were in also he passed away 12 years ago I knew that she would be leaving us soon. The next day she passed away and I was there when she took her last breath, I wouldn't have had it any other way.
Christmas was put in perspective. It is a time to thank God for sending his only son to die for our sins. It is a time to gather with the ones you love and celebrate and appreciate one another. It is not just about the gifts or the tinsel on the tree. It is about love actually. Christ died for us in love. That is what we should celebrate. I learned last year that the best gift I had was to be with my grandmother, no Christmas gift will ever replace those precious last hours that we spent together.
So this year, my family is coming here. I find myself getting a little crazy about the food, and the gifts, and all of the other Christmas to dos on my list. I am getting caught up into trying to make this Christmas a joyful one and for a second I got lost and forgot about what really matters and that is by God's grace we will be together again, that we will have one another. I encourage everyone to remember that it is the moments that make holidays special, not the gifts or the food, it is the moments that we share with one another.
God bless everyone and Merry Christmas!
Thursday, December 18, 2008
My Date to the Theater
It is interesting being a single mom. I am so accustomed to doing almost everything with Anya that I really don't mind not having a date or a significant other. Sure there are times that I miss the companionship and the fun and passion of a relationship, but it is not a void. Well, I love the theater and I have written plays and had readings. I try to expose Anya to the arts as much as possible. One of my hopes for Anya is that she explores her creativity and uses her imagination as much as possible. She loves to paint, and read and pretend. She calls herself Anya Princess, and then she will call me a princess and makes me speak in an english accent. It is quite hilarious.
This past weekend my mom came in from Pittsburgh, and we did some Christmas activities. One of those was seeing a snippet of a play.Anya loved it and cried when it was over. So I got tickets last night and took her to the theater. She was quite excited. She kept saying, we are going to the theater! We had dinner and then we went to watch the play. She watched it so intently. Of course she cried when it was over. On the way home we talked about it and I realized how much she enjoyed it and how much I enjoyed seeing it with her.
I have to say my dates with Anya are some of the best I have ever had with anyone! Including dates with men. I haven't dated since I became single and really don't plan to anytime soon. Right now my focus is on my daughter and doing what God wants me to do. There is such joy in my heart when I watch Anya doing something new for the first time. I feel incredibly blessed to expose her to all of the wonderful things that are out there. Interestingly enough I feel as though I am experiencing things for the first time with her.
Sure, I hope that one day God blesses me with a nurturing and fulfilling relationship. But for now I am completely content with celebrating life with the most beautiful and rewarding gift that I could be given... Anya.
Have a blessed day!
This past weekend my mom came in from Pittsburgh, and we did some Christmas activities. One of those was seeing a snippet of a play.Anya loved it and cried when it was over. So I got tickets last night and took her to the theater. She was quite excited. She kept saying, we are going to the theater! We had dinner and then we went to watch the play. She watched it so intently. Of course she cried when it was over. On the way home we talked about it and I realized how much she enjoyed it and how much I enjoyed seeing it with her.
I have to say my dates with Anya are some of the best I have ever had with anyone! Including dates with men. I haven't dated since I became single and really don't plan to anytime soon. Right now my focus is on my daughter and doing what God wants me to do. There is such joy in my heart when I watch Anya doing something new for the first time. I feel incredibly blessed to expose her to all of the wonderful things that are out there. Interestingly enough I feel as though I am experiencing things for the first time with her.
Sure, I hope that one day God blesses me with a nurturing and fulfilling relationship. But for now I am completely content with celebrating life with the most beautiful and rewarding gift that I could be given... Anya.
Have a blessed day!
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Matthew 5:9 Blessed are the peacemakers for they shall be called children of God
When a relationship ends between two people they go through a time of adjustment, and that can be very difficult period and eventually it will usually get better. But, every once in awhile you hit a snag. That is what happened to me yesterday. What started out as a typical conversation with my daughter's father soon turned into an argument. I have not had an argument with him in ages, basically we get along and I decided a long time ago not to let myself argue with him or say harsh words. After all why should I? We had good times, we have a beautiful daughter, and arguments never lead to anything positive. But yesterday was a different story.
We had an argument about something he said that offended me, that pushed my buttons, and was something we had quite a few disagreements about last year. Afterward he told me he was only joking, I did not find it funny, and then somehow the conversation took on a life of its' own. The past was drudged up and old wounds were reopened. It was not pretty. To make a long story short, we both hung up feeling angry and hurt. When I left work I felt sad, hurt and angry. I asked God to forgive me and to take away the bad feelings I had felt.
Well the evening went on, and usually he calls Anya before she goes to sleep. It was getting late so I called him and let her talk with him. Afterwards when I got on the phone, we both apologized, I think we both knew that we did not want to go to sleep without apologizing.
Listen ladies, if you are a single mom most likely you are going to have a relationship with the father of your children. It is up to you to make the best out of that relationship. Now, don't get me wrong they should make the effort also. However, you are not responsible in the eyes of God for their actions you are responsible for yours. You take the initiative and be the Peacemaker. Even if you feel you are 100% correct, swallow your pride and be the peacemaker because God is watching your actions. Treat your ex like Jesus would treat people. We are human and it is not always easy to turn the other cheek or to give an apology when you feel as though you are right. But God will bless you for it. You are a child of God therefore it is your duty to be a peacemaker. You are not to cause strife, you are not to spew harsh criticisms, you are to love one another whether or not they are in your home any longer.
After our apologies, last night we chatted a little longer and had a good conversation. I know for a fact that I slept better last night knowing that I sincerely apologized and asked for God's forgiveness for my own anger. It is much easier to be a peacemaker than to be someone who harbors anger and resentment. Let's walk in the footsteps of Jesus and be peacemakers, loving those around us.
God Bless
We had an argument about something he said that offended me, that pushed my buttons, and was something we had quite a few disagreements about last year. Afterward he told me he was only joking, I did not find it funny, and then somehow the conversation took on a life of its' own. The past was drudged up and old wounds were reopened. It was not pretty. To make a long story short, we both hung up feeling angry and hurt. When I left work I felt sad, hurt and angry. I asked God to forgive me and to take away the bad feelings I had felt.
Well the evening went on, and usually he calls Anya before she goes to sleep. It was getting late so I called him and let her talk with him. Afterwards when I got on the phone, we both apologized, I think we both knew that we did not want to go to sleep without apologizing.
Listen ladies, if you are a single mom most likely you are going to have a relationship with the father of your children. It is up to you to make the best out of that relationship. Now, don't get me wrong they should make the effort also. However, you are not responsible in the eyes of God for their actions you are responsible for yours. You take the initiative and be the Peacemaker. Even if you feel you are 100% correct, swallow your pride and be the peacemaker because God is watching your actions. Treat your ex like Jesus would treat people. We are human and it is not always easy to turn the other cheek or to give an apology when you feel as though you are right. But God will bless you for it. You are a child of God therefore it is your duty to be a peacemaker. You are not to cause strife, you are not to spew harsh criticisms, you are to love one another whether or not they are in your home any longer.
After our apologies, last night we chatted a little longer and had a good conversation. I know for a fact that I slept better last night knowing that I sincerely apologized and asked for God's forgiveness for my own anger. It is much easier to be a peacemaker than to be someone who harbors anger and resentment. Let's walk in the footsteps of Jesus and be peacemakers, loving those around us.
God Bless
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Matthew 6:7 Ask and it shall be given you, seek and ye shall find, knock and it shall be opened to you.
This verse from Matthew 6:7 is one of my favorite verses in the bible. As a single mom we are often times solely responsible for our children. Even if their father is involved in their life (which mine is) it can still be challenging when you think of all of the responsibility that falls on your shoulders. But God is there to ease our anxieties. I have been a single mom for awhile now, and when Anya and I first moved out on our own, I had many apprehensions. Sure I had always lived on my own before, but now I was responisble for this beautiful child, I had to provide a good home for her. I have a decent job, but when you are paying everything on your own, you can't help but to feel some anxiety. I knew in my heart that moving out was the best option for me, Anya and her dad. But now I had to really rely on God.
I prayed all the time. Sometimes I didn't trust the lord like I should have. But this passage has made a difference in my life. We need to pray and ask God to give us what we need, we need to go to him, when we do that he can open doors for us that we had only seen as closed. When we begin to knock or pray to God in earnest he hears our prayers, after all he already knows what we need, and he will provide.
When Anya and I first moved out on our own we lived in a spacious two bedroom apartment. It was nice, and it was a good home for us. But, I wanted Anya to live in a home that had a yard, I wanted her to have a playroom, and I wanted to be able to wash my clothes in my own house instead of going to the laundromat. But I was grateful for what I had. When my lease was up I inquired about the townhouses that my real estate company had. There were either none left or they were way out of my budget. I look at single family homes to rent, and I had my heart set on finding one. It seemed that in the area I was looking nothing was available to suit our needs. I prayed that God would let me find a home that would be comfortable and affordable.
One day I happened to call my realty company and a 2 bedroom townhouse that was being completely remodeled was available when my lease was up. It was affordable, completely new with shiny hardwood floors, it had a yard, a basement that was big enough for a playroom and a washer and dryer. I loved it. I had my heart set on a single family home, but I knew that God had answered my prayer and he knew exactly what I needed. It has been a month and Anya and I are very happy in our new home and we thank God for it.
Ask God, for what you need through prayer, and once you do that believe and have faith that God will provide for you. It may not be exactly what you asked for, and it may not be given to you that day or even that month or year, but when it is given it will be exactly what God has in store for you. Don't be afraid to ask God for what you want, we are his children and he will take care of us and ours.
God Bless
I prayed all the time. Sometimes I didn't trust the lord like I should have. But this passage has made a difference in my life. We need to pray and ask God to give us what we need, we need to go to him, when we do that he can open doors for us that we had only seen as closed. When we begin to knock or pray to God in earnest he hears our prayers, after all he already knows what we need, and he will provide.
When Anya and I first moved out on our own we lived in a spacious two bedroom apartment. It was nice, and it was a good home for us. But, I wanted Anya to live in a home that had a yard, I wanted her to have a playroom, and I wanted to be able to wash my clothes in my own house instead of going to the laundromat. But I was grateful for what I had. When my lease was up I inquired about the townhouses that my real estate company had. There were either none left or they were way out of my budget. I look at single family homes to rent, and I had my heart set on finding one. It seemed that in the area I was looking nothing was available to suit our needs. I prayed that God would let me find a home that would be comfortable and affordable.
One day I happened to call my realty company and a 2 bedroom townhouse that was being completely remodeled was available when my lease was up. It was affordable, completely new with shiny hardwood floors, it had a yard, a basement that was big enough for a playroom and a washer and dryer. I loved it. I had my heart set on a single family home, but I knew that God had answered my prayer and he knew exactly what I needed. It has been a month and Anya and I are very happy in our new home and we thank God for it.
Ask God, for what you need through prayer, and once you do that believe and have faith that God will provide for you. It may not be exactly what you asked for, and it may not be given to you that day or even that month or year, but when it is given it will be exactly what God has in store for you. Don't be afraid to ask God for what you want, we are his children and he will take care of us and ours.
God Bless
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